THIS WEEK ON THE PROGRAM…

Having returned from rubbing elbows with actual rock royalty (and surviving), your hosts Chaz Charles and the Voluptuary of Sound Doctor Glund descend once more into the sacred text of Colosseum—armed with nothing but sharp ears, questionable memory recall, and a bag of contraband jelly beans.

This week’s mission: the thunderous, mind-expanding, utterly undeniable closing statement of the debut album…

THOSE ABOUT TO DIE And yes… it absolutely earns the title.

TRACK UNDER THE MICROSCOPE:

Those About To Die – Colosseum The Doctor declares it without hesitation: “If you don’t know Colosseum… THIS is where you start.”

What follows is a full-blown sonic autopsy:

• Drums that don’t just keep time—they command it
• Organ work that lays down a thick, chugging carpet of groove
• Guitar and sax interplay so tight it may in fact be a single sentient organism
• A band functioning less like individuals and more like a musical octopus with a PhD

Verdict:

This is not a song.

This is a controlled detonation of talent.

TRACKS LISTENED TO / DIGRESSION ZONE (ABANDON HOPE):

Because no episode is complete without veering wildly off course:

Eddie Hinton – Something Heavy

→ Soul, grit, and a man absolutely refusing to let go of a groove

R.L. Burnside – The Criminal Inside Me

→ Mississippi blues storytelling featuring:

• 40 nickels
• A bag of potato chips
• And several imminent threats of bodily harm

Kim Fowley – Animal Man / Chinese Water Torture

→ A deeply unsettling descent into late-60s experimental madness

→ May or may not summon something into your home

HIGHLIGHTS YOU DID NOT ASK FOR BUT ARE GETTING ANYWAY:

• A wedding dance set to Colosseum (because romance is subjective)
• A helicopter wedding over Niagara Falls (because gravity is optional)
• Extensive discussion of “ass pockets” (science pending)
• The phrase “bases drunk” permanently entering the lexicon
• The realization that rock stars… might be lunatics

PRESCRIPTION:

Take one dose of Those About To Die at maximum volume.

Repeat as needed until:

• Your face melts
• Your neighbors complain
• Or you begin explaining time signatures to strangers

Avoid operating heavy machinery unless it is a Hammond organ.

Here's to ya Clay Cole, let's go grab a 'visky.

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