In this episode of A Life Afterlife Podcast, host Deborah Gabby Baker sits down with Ryan "Chaos" Curtis, professional MMA fighter and host of the Made in Chaos podcast, for a raw, wide-ranging conversation about identity, grief, and resilience. Ryan opens up about growing up in Dublin 1, the tight-knit but fading sense of community he was raised in, and the boxing legacy in his family (Champions Avenue is even named after his grandfather). He speaks candidly about the neck injury that nearly ended his life and forced him to rebuild his identity beyond fighting, the recovery process, and why he ultimately stepped back from competition. The conversation turns deeply personal as Gabby offers spontaneous spiritual readings, connecting Ryan to his late father — who died from an overdose when Ryan was ten months old — and his mother, who passed from COPD. Ryan reflects on fatherhood, becoming a dad to his daughter, survivor's guilt around friends still recovering from serious injuries, his skepticism toward traditional therapy, and the philosophy behind his own podcast, Made in Chaos. It's an honest, funny, and moving episode about turning chaos into growth.

Timecodes

• 00:00 – Welcome & introducing guest Ryan "Chaos" Curtis
• 00:30 – Catching up, mutual connections (Kylie Gracie), valuing authenticity
• 03:04 – Ryan's background: growing up in Dublin 1
• 04:13 – Community, tenement history, and Henrietta Street
• 05:23 – How neighborhoods and community have changed over time
• 06:24 – Ryan's mum, Dublin identity, and changing culture
• 07:35 – Theories on why community has faded (money, social media, comparison)
• 08:43 – Ryan's mum's passing (COPD) and grief stored in the body
• 09:50 – Family boxing legacy — Champions Avenue named after his grandfather
• 10:32 – Boxing vs. MMA and brain damage discussion
• 11:23 – Deciding not to let fighting define his identity
• 13:22 – Ryan's stubbornness, star sign, and astrology chat
• 16:23 – Marriage, family traditions, and changing values today
• 17:04 – Ryan's views on masculinity and protecting family
• 18:18 – Religion, faith, and living a "holy" life
• 20:39 – Authenticity vs. seeking online validation
• 23:26 – How the accident shaped his mindset and outlook on life
• 24:16 – Life as "the best teacher" and learning from hardship
• 26:36 – Friendship, slagging, and staying grounded
• 28:31 – Ryan's neck injury — what happened and immediate aftermath
• 28:54 – Did he have a near-death experience?
• 29:40 – Becoming a father and his daughter's role in his recovery
• 32:05 – Life in the hospital and unexpected silver linings
• 33:31 – Gabby's reading: "the accident may have saved your life"
• 34:19 – Why he believes his path was diverted from a worse outcome
• 35:04 – Why he doesn't see fighting as "a sport"
• 36:51 – Mentality needed to compete at the highest level
• 38:08 – His near-UFC career and the "burnt toast theory"
• 40:15 – Reading: connecting with his late father's spirit
• 41:07 – His father's death by overdose when Ryan was 10 months old
• 44:35 – Grief, memory, and staying connected to lost loved ones
• 44:56 – Reading: his mother's miscarried baby
• 47:41 – Soul contracts and spiritual perspective on hardship
• 48:13 – Crystals, moon charging, and Gabby's spiritual practices
• 49:31 – Where Ryan is today in his physical recovery
• 50:46 – Survivor's guilt toward friends still recovering
• 51:04 – Why traditional therapy didn't work for him
• 54:11 – Confronting emotions vs. using the gym as an escape
• 57:09 – Introducing his podcast "Made in Chaos" and its premise
• 59:23 – Light-hearted wrap-up and goodbyes
• 1:00:01 – Outro and disclaimer