Social media has turned relationships into a checklist. We’re constantly told to “find someone secure.” That avoidant people are walking red flags and anxious partners are just “too much”.

Attachment styles are presented as something we are born with, instead of what they really are: dynamic patterns.

In this episode, we explore:

- origins of Attachment theory

- how to identify your attachment style

- whether we can change it

- how to use it in a healthy way for our relationships

... plus some more!

Sources & interesting reads:

• Attachment quiz: https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/

• https://www.attachmentproject.com/⁠

• https://www.verywellmind.com/john-bowlby-biography-1907-1990-2795514

• Ainsworth, M. D. S., Blehar, M. C., Waters, E., & Wall, S. (1978). Patterns of attachment: A psychological study of the strange situation. Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.

• Fraley, R. C., Roisman, G. I., Booth-LaForce, C., Owen, M. T., & Holland, A. S. (2013). Interpersonal and Genetic Origins of Adult Attachment Styles: A Longitudinal Study From Infancy to Early Adulthood. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 104(5), 817–838. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0031435
• Bakermans-Kranenburg, M. J., & van IJzendoorn, M. H. (2023). Sensitive responsiveness in expectant and new fathers. Current Opinion in Psychology, 50, Article 101580. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.copsyc.2023.101580