339: Greatest Hits: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner
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In this "Greatest Hits" episode we revisit one of our most impactful conversations with child development expert Claire Lerner. As parents who have personally navigated the challenges of raising children who don't respond to traditional gentle parenting approaches, we share how isolating and exhausting that experience can be and how Claire's expertise changed everything. Claire breaks down why some kids are simply wired differently, explains that challenging behaviors aren't manipulation but rather a need for boundaries and support, and offers practical strategies for helping children self-regulate. From rethinking timeouts to surviving big family gatherings, this episode is a must-listen for parents of strong-willed or highly reactive kids.
Key Topics Covered
- Why some children are "wired differently" and don't respond to gentle parenting.
- Understanding child behavior — why kids act out and what they actually need.
- Claire's concept of the "safe space break" as a modern alternative to timeouts.
- How to help children self-regulate during moments of aggression toward others.
- Managing big family gatherings and holiday triggers for highly reactive kids.
- How to talk to family members and teachers about your child's unique needs.
- The importance of community and reducing parental isolation and burnout.
LINKS AND RESOURCES:
Meet Claire.
Visit Claire's website.
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This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.