『309: How to Handle Tough Conversations Without Losing Your Cool with Gabe Karp』のカバーアート

309: How to Handle Tough Conversations Without Losing Your Cool with Gabe Karp

309: How to Handle Tough Conversations Without Losing Your Cool with Gabe Karp

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Life isn't all smooth conversations and easy people. Sometimes it's messy, uncomfortable, and straight-up frustrating. In this episode, Erin sits down with former trial lawyer turned entrepreneur and conflict expert Gabe Karp to talk about how to handle tough situations without spiraling, avoiding, or blowing things up. Because here's the truth: conflict isn't the problem. How you handle it is. Gabe shares practical strategies to help you stay grounded, take control, and walk away without regret… even when the other person is making it hard. Here's what you'll hear: - Why there are always "two tokens" in every situation and how to choose wisely -The 5 traps that quietly sabotage your ability to handle conflict -A simple shift that helps you stay calm when things start going sideways -Gabe's least proud leadership moment and the lesson that stuck -The subtle behavior that might be holding others back (and you don't even realize it) Website: GabeKarp.com www.linkedin.com/in/gabe-karp-1b772a1b ">LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/gabe-karp-1b772a1b https://youtu.be/ggOQg6uUV2M?si=nKviXwvHJkGgvLGk ">Check out Gabe's TED Talk, How To Thrive With Difficult People: https://youtu.be/ggOQg6uUV2M?si=nKviXwvHJkGgvLGk If you'd like quick tangible tips and practical corporate career advice to level up your authentic leadership, download the 10 simple "plays" to stop selling out and start standing out at https://bauthenticinc.mykajabi.com/freebie To connect with Erin and/or Nicole, email: hello@bauthenticinc.com If you like jammin' with us on the podcast, b sure to join us for more fun and inspiration! Follow b Cause on Twitter (really it's mostly Nicole) Follow Erin on LinkedIn or Instagram Join the b Cause Podcast Facebook Group Take our simple, fun and insightful"What's your workplace superhero name?"quiz Unleash your Authentic Superpower with Erin's book,"You Do You (ish)" Check out our blog for more no-BS career advice Work with Us Or just buy some fun, authentic, kick-ars merch here DISCLAIMER: This episode is not explicit, though contains mild swearing that may be unsustainable for younger audiences. Tweetable Comments "Everyone knows what "better" looks like. They just don't know where to start." "When you really screw something up for a client, that is an opportunity to make the relationship stronger and better." "Mistakes are inevitable and a real true test of character is how we react once we recognize we've made a mistake." "You cannot drive growth and innovation without conflict." "What do you get out of being mad?" Episode Transcript This transcript has been lightly edited for clarity and readability. In this episode, Erin Hatzikostas talks with conflict expert Gabe Karp about how to handle difficult workplace conversations, give feedback without becoming the bully, manage conflict with bosses and clients, and use practical tools like the "two tokens" theory, the "shopping list voice," and the penguin philosophy. Why Conflict Is So Hard at Work Erin: I'm really excited to talk to you today. I think we can never have too many episodes about tough conversations. Conflict is the word you use, and our audience is working in a very Game of Thrones-type environment — corporate America. Erin: You are a conflict expert. Was there a moment when you realized this was the work you wanted to do? Gabe: There was. I spent ten years as a litigator, mostly in commercial litigation and legal malpractice. If you think a normal lawsuit is contentious, suing lawyers for screwing up is that on steroids. Gabe: I learned a lot about anger and how it flows through a room. For all the wrong reasons, I loved it. Gabe: Then I left private practice and joined a startup. We were growing fast, and whenever there were issues — a client problem, an internal mistake, anything — I wanted to jump in and fix it. But everyone around me was uncomfortable with conflict, and I didn't realize that at first. Gabe: I realized we couldn't fix what needed fixing if everyone was tiptoeing around issues. I had to consciously find ways to help people feel comfortable having difficult conversations. Can People Get Better at Conflict? Erin: Do you think people can transform? A lot of people listening may think, "I just naturally run from conflict." Gabe: Absolutely. I think it's nurture, not nature. We all have the same fight-or-flight instinct. But the ability to pause that instinctive response in the moment is something people can learn. Gabe: The thing I've found most effective is helping people find the right entry point into a difficult conversation. One line I use all the time is, "If I were in your position, I'd want someone to tell me this." Gabe: Once people have that one sentence to break the ice, all the things they need to say can come out in a productive, respectful way. Erin: So one of the most important things is the entry point into the ...
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