Your dream home awaits—there's only two things in your way....

The great Australian dream is slipping out of reach for Keira and her friends. No partner, no house, no kids. At 30-ahem, she is still languishing in a mould-filled share house, with an unexplained and ever-growing hole in the floorboards that threatens to consume her and her housemates.

Her part-time job as a nanny to a pair of atrocious twins—and her role as emotional support servant at the beck and call of their mother, Johanna—provides barely enough money for the G&Ts she finds necessary to get through her other job as a freelance copywriter—though it does allow her to steal a fancy avocado every now and then. Each day she can feel herself falling further and further behind.

When her best friend Dylan is able to buy an apartment with the help of his partner's inheritance, Keira sees a way out. The bank of Mum and Dad. But what to do with parents who are in the rudest of health, and whose plans threaten to spend the only lifeline she has? From the lounge room of her rotting share house she hatches a deadly plan to speed up the process of wealth transfer.

An audacious book that asks just how far you will go to get your dream house (or at least a one bedroom flat without mushrooms growing in the bathroom).

"This is a dark, hilarious and urgent book about a younger generation being locked out of the housing market and all the boomers who still think it's because they spend too much on avocado on toast." FELICITY CASTAGNA, author of No More Boats