In this episode of Lessons from Behind the Chair, Evet shares stories from nearly forty years behind the salon chair to explore validation, attention, reassurance, and the quiet ways we seek to feel seen. From repeated selfies to interrupted conversations, she examines how external reassurance, phone distractions, and indirect communication shape our relationships—and asks whether lasting confidence can ever come from someone else.

• Why repeated reassurance often points to something deeper.

• How phone distractions change conversations.

• What 'phubbing' is and why it matters.

• The difference between being seen and feeling seen.

• Why curiosity is often more helpful than judgment.

Research & Psychology Mentioned

• External validation

• Self-objectification

• Phubbing

• Conversational reciprocity •

Conflict avoidance

Reflection Questions

• Where do you most often look for reassurance?

• When do you feel most present with another person?

• What helps reassurance become self-trust?

About the Host

Evet DeCota is an Associate Certified Coach (ACC), psychology graduate, longtime hairstylist, and founder of DeCota Life Coaching.

After nearly four decades listening to people's stories from behind the chair, she now combines psychology, coaching, and lived experience to explore resilience, identity, behavior change, and authentic human connection through The Original Self Podcast.

Connect with Evet

Website: decotalifecoaching.com

Email: decotalifecoaching@gmail.com