TL;DR Holidays in high-conflict co-parenting are less “silent night” and more screaming fights. Stockings get stuffed with last-minute emails, schedules get ripped apart like wrapping paper, and family court lurks like an unwanted guest who refuses to leave.

Long Version: Because in high-conflict custody and divorce, the holidays aren’t “magic.” They’re leverage. Welcome to High Conflict Hell.

Thanksgiving becomes a custody showdown. Christmas becomes a negotiation. And the parenting plan you thought was “clear” turns into a choose-your-own-adventure written by your ex… interpreted by their lawyer… and enforced by whatever power play is happening that week.

In this episode, Jen and JeniLynn talk about holiday schedules in divorce and why high-conflict parents don’t just “follow the plan” — they weaponize it. We get into the panic of counting down to a break, screenshotting the holiday schedule, and then getting accused of “creating confusion” because you dared to document what’s literally written on the page.

We talk about:

• Holiday custody schedules and why exchanges become battlegrounds
• How Mother’s Day and Father’s Day get used as control moves (because of course they do)
• When “no flexibility” is the whole point — especially if ruining your holiday is the goal
• Kids noticing everything: who shows up, who doesn’t, who gets gifts, who gets punished
• The silent part nobody wants to say: phones get taken, calls don’t happen, and kids feel it
• How “traditions” don’t survive when conflict is the tradition

And then we go even deeper into the mind game: the way a toxic ex can flip the story so fast you start questioning your own reality. One minute it’s “I never get to see the kids,” the next minute it’s “Your mom doesn’t get holidays,” and suddenly the kids are stuck living in two different books — Mom’s house and Dad’s house — while the adults act like it’s normal.

We also talk about the exhausting math of holidays in divorce: planning trips when it’s not your year, trying not to fall apart, and watching your co-parent turn last-minute decisions into “hero moments” that still somehow cost you money, time, and sanity.

And because this is High Conflict Hell, we end with the only coping mechanism that makes sense: “What’s not the worst thing that happened to you this week?”
(Spoiler: the bar is in hell.)

If your co-parenting communication is respectful and holidays are peaceful — truly, bless you. But this is not your church.

If any of this hits…

Welcome, Hellion.
You’re exactly where you belong.

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