A comment in a leadership meeting rubbed Kerry Siggins the wrong way. She did not react. She told herself it was not worth bringing up. And then she spent the next week noticing she was on edge every time she interacted with the person who said it, unable to shake a story she had built about what he meant.

This episode is the first in a six-part series on the SHARES model, and it starts with the step Kerry has found most leaders skip without realizing it: specify your outcome. Before any difficult conversation, before any hard truth needs to be said, there is a question worth sitting with. What do I actually want when I walk out of this room?

Kerry walks through exactly how she used this with her own team. Not to give feedback. Not to correct anyone's behavior. Just to be honest about how a moment had landed and to protect a relationship she cared about. She specified three things she wanted from the conversation before she ever had it, and that clarity changed everything about how the conversation went.

What she discovered when she finally said something is the part of this story that stays with you. The story she had been carrying in her head for a week was completely wrong. The intention behind the comment was not what she assumed. And the miscommunication, like most miscommunications, came down to one simple thing: nobody had said clearly what they meant.

To learn more, visit http://kerrysiggins.com Her new book, Talk With Trust, comes out August 4th and is available for pre-order now.

Let’s connect on LinkedIn, Instagram, or TikTok!

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kerry-siggins-166b66/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kerry.siggins/

TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@kerry.siggins

Kerry Siggins has given feedback the wrong way. She remembers a specific conversation, someone brought into her office, Kerry upset about the way they had been showing up, ready to express it. The person asked for specific examples. Kerry did not have any. She had prepared her feelings and nothing else. The conversation spiraled. The relationship was damaged. And the lesson stayed with her.

This episode is the second in a six-part series on the SHARES model, and it covers the H: have your facts and feelings ready. It is the preparation step, and it is the one most leaders skip.

Kerry also shares a recent conversation that could have gone very differently. Someone on her team had breached confidentiality, shared something they should not have with people who should not have had it. Kerry did not know, walking into the room, whether she was going to fire this person. The outcome depended on the conversation.

To learn more, visit http://kerrysiggins.com Her new book, Talk With Trust, comes out August 4th and is available for pre-order now.

Let’s connect on LinkedIn, Instagram, or TikTok!

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kerry-siggins-166b66/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kerry.siggins/

TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@kerry.siggins

A few weeks ago, I was sitting in my therapist's office with my son. I didn't expect to walk out of the session thinking about myself. But that's what happened.

We were there to talk about my son, about being an empath, about how he absorbs the feelings of everyone around him, about why that can feel isolating when the people closest to him don't experience the world the same way. And in the middle of that conversation, his therapist looked at us and said, "Your mom is the main character in her own life. That's the disconnect."

She wasn't wrong. But I had to sit with it for a while before I understood what it actually meant.

I've spent most of my career as a performer. That's the honest version. I built things, led things, proved things, and a lot of that was driven by a quiet belief that my value came from what I could achieve. Not from who I was. From what I could show. That role worked. It made me successful. It also made me exhausted in ways I didn't fully name until recently.

In this episode, I talk through the archetypes that shape how we show up: as leaders, as parents, as people trying to figure out who they actually are versus who they've learned to be. The performer. The caretaker. The empath. The peacekeeper. The victim. The main character. Each one is real. Each one solves a problem. And each one can become a trap when it stops being a choice.

What I keep coming back to is this: the roles we play aren't the problem. The problem is when they start making decisions for us, when what began as a survival strategy becomes an identity we can't see around.

I'm still working through this. I don't think that's a bad thing.

To learn more, visit http://kerrysiggins.com Her new book, Talk With Trust, comes out August 4th and is available for pre-order now.

Let’s connect on LinkedIn, Instagram, or TikTok!

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kerry-siggins-166b66/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kerry.siggins/

TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@kerry.siggins